Ninja Terminator

1986

Action / Adventure

15
IMDb Rating 4.4/10 10 1446 1.4K

Director

Top cast

Richard Harrison as Ninja master Harry
720p.BLU 1080p.BLU
834.83 MB
1280*536
English 2.0
NR
23.976 fps
1 hr 30 min
Seeds 16
1.51 GB
1920*804
English 2.0
NR
23.976 fps
1 hr 30 min
Seeds 24

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by gorthu 5 / 10

A spliced up ninja cheesefest starring Richard Harrison and Hwang Jang Lee

I have seen way too many Joseph Lai/Godfrey Ho ninja movies, and most are completely unwatchable. About 1/10 may have something decent in it. Luckily, Ninja Terminator is one of those in the minority. The dialogue is so bad that it is actually good. It is laugh out loud funny at times, but I don't think it was supposed to be. If you can make it through a script that seems to have been written by a 5 year old, you may be able to make it through this. It doesn't help that this is 3 movies spliced together, and it doesn't make any sense. But if you love bad movies, you can't pass up this masterpiece of horrible cinema. In one scene, the bad guy uses a toy robot to send a message to Richard Harrison. The toy robot arrives with smoke and can talk. Godfrey Ho really wanted to show off his $5 budget. And if you like to see people kick a lot, you will get plenty of that. Jack Lam (named Jaguar Wong in the movie) and Hwang Jang Lee give great kicking displays. Hwang only participates in the final fight, but Jack Lam gets to show off his kicking skills throughout the entire movie.

I have the Videoasia DVD and the picture quality is decent, and the English dubbing is classic. Sometimes a guy will have a redneck voice, and sometimes it will sound like a little kid. Fans of cheesy movies will love this Godfrey Ho classic. "I don't usually smoke this brand, but I'll do it for you."

Reviewed by yaffleridesagain 4 / 10

Drunken crabs

A cheap looking idol that splits into three parts grants the bearer immunity to rubber swords of all kinds. But only if he holds all three parts! Actually, it works with just the one bit as demonstrated by one of the mustachioed ninjas midway through the movie which, at a stroke as lethal as any ninjas blade, completely kills the meager plot logic the film has managed to piece together by this point. At first it looks as though the entire film is just going to be people beating each other up in a mall garden but the plot does start to develop towards something like a story later on.

Meanwhile, Jaguar Wong wanders around getting involved with kidnappings and his scheming former lover. Everywhere he goes groups of three or four men attack him feebly providing intermittent filler for the already vague plot.

All this sounds quite reasonable and par for the course but there are some decidedly strange additions. The ninja master uses a cheerful garfield phone for example, the mid-level henchman wears a woman's wig without explanation and the bad guy delivers his messages via cheap kids robot toys that someone must have had to walk right up to the door and place, rendering them less in the ninja style of stealth than say slipping the note under the door.

I got a few laughs out of this movie, it's bad but in a good way. My favourite bit was the way the ninja master was able to completely hide his ninja double wife from his wife whose biggest worry in life is the crabs she's steaming for dinner escaping. Even stopping one escaping by hurling a shuriken across the room doesn't seem to arouse her suspicions!

Reviewed by BandSAboutMovies 4 / 10

Ninja. Terminator.

If you owned a Korean film called The Uninvited Guest Of The Star Ferry, it probably wouldn't sell in the west. But what if you shot new footage of Supreme Ninja having his three greatest warriors - Ninja Masters Tamashi, Baron and Harry MacQueen (Richard Harrison) - celebrate the second decade of his power by assembling the Golden Ninja Warrior and making him impervious from swords, well, then you'd be able to sell that.

Godfrey Ho. Genius or madman? Maybe both?

Two years after the three ninjas took each part of the statue to keep their master from becoming too strong, Karada has killed the ninja Tamashi and Baron and Harry have been manipulated into battling one another. Will Supreme Ninja take the statue and reign forever?

So yes, that's the basic plot. What I have not captured - I really don't know if I can - is just how lunatic this movie gets, constantly introducing new characters and ideas and rarely following up on them, like if someone introduced Jack Kirby to manga and then slipped him some amphetamines. I also am writing this under the influence of COVID-19 and the way my brain has been going from lucid to foggy to sleep to pain to being exhausted in a matter of seconds feels exactly like this movie but in a way better way than not being able to breathe and needing to sanitize my hands every ten seconds.

Richard Harrison is a hero. I mean, yes, his career probably was ruined by Godfrey Ho repeatedly re-editing him into movies. I wish there was a way I could send him some cash by Paypal to make up for that because in this movie he wears a camouflage ninja suit and talks on a Garfield phone and honestly, I've never seen Robert Deniro do that.

There's also a scene where one ninja can shoot fire out of his hands and another shoots ice and you know, that's no CGI, it's two dudes putting their lives on the line to entertain you thirty some years in the digital future. Also: sex scenes that refine the word gratuitous.

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